Reply to 19 year gap - Will everything be okay?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP: We’ve only been dating a year and a half. I came here to hear both the good and the bad of a long term big age difference marriage to help me think things through as he was ready before I was in thinking about next steps, not because any decision about the future is imminent, I’m in no rush.

I’ve read everything and I hear the concerns. I very much appreciate the wisdom & knowledge of many of the older women here who’ve shared their experiences. Right now, we’re just enjoying each other’s company and thinking far into the future—not making decisions under pressure. Whatever decision (at minimum a year from now) I ultimately make for me and my future kids, I’ll be sure to own.

I misspoke earlier about the prenup, — he’s promised me money from his assets in the trust, not just the prenup. The prenup he’s promised is actually more generous than a typical marital equality split. But, I’m also working on building my own career and don’t plan on relying on a spouse in the future.[/quote]

But you *should* be able to rely on your spouse. You cannot rely on him because he left his ex-wife, isn't a good dad to his current kids, and has 100% of the power in the relationship. Even the fact that he is trying to buy you with promised assets in the trust that he has given you $0 from after 1.5 years of your life that you've already given him should scare you. [b]And is he really showing you $26M that is 100% his money or is it tied up, owed to his kids from his first wife, already been promised to his first wife in the trust. I'm sure he made the same promises to the first wife -- you aren't the first one he has groomed in this exact same way.[/b][/quote]

Good point. What does his divorce agreement say about paying for college and grad school, for example. Distinct from child support. If he's agreed to pay for both for two kids, there goes a million right there.[/quote]

Of one these ex-wives here. Our MSA stipulates that son inherits 70% of estate in trusts of no other children; at least 30% if there are other children born after divorce. He established a trust to fulfill these provisions right after divorce. 
So OP should keep her pocket wider for his empty promises. She will mostly likely have to waive the spousal share if he ever marries her [/quote]

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