Reply to I wish society didn't encourage people to put off having kids.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think about this too. My mom was 25 when she had me; I was 30 when I had my first. It's only a difference of 5 years but when I think about where she was at 45 and where I'll be, it feels like a huge gap.

But - my parents struggled a lot when they were younger. Now they are happy and it all worked out, but when they were in their late 20s with three small kids, my mom didn't work at all and my dad had a mediocre job. They lived paycheck to paycheck for a long time and rented until I was 6 years old. Compare that to me and H, who waited a few years, got graduate degrees and work experience - we have a SERIOUSLY different life and financial situation than they did. We can afford good childcare, we own our house, we travel. It's hard not to look at my parents now, retired in their 60s with grandkids and plenty of disposable income, and not feel like they did it right; but I'd still probably rather do it my way in the scheme of things.

I agree that we encourage people to wait too much though. When I got pregnant at 29 people acted like I was a teen mom. But I'm very happy that [b]when I'm 50 years old my kids will be out of the house and I can start thinking about my next phase of life (living wherever I want, retiring, traveling, etc.) whereas some of my friends' kids will just be starting middle school D: [/quote][/b]

Same here.  I know some 50 year olds with elementary aged kids.  I understand that sometimes these things are out of our control, but I’m so tired at 40 with an 8 and 10yo, I can’t imagine having a new born at this age.[/quote]

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