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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]Unfortunately the standard is now that you work FT and handle all logistics, planning etc. 
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I don’t recommend having kids unless you go in with eyes wide open about this.

Even if your husband is supportive of you staying home, it’s a terrible move because it places you in a precarious position. [/quote]

^^This. You need to realize, OP, that you are competing with women who will provide to a man all the benefits of SAHM (bear the mental load, handle all the newborn stuff while healing from a major medical event, clean, caretake, be first line of defense when kid is sick) and also be pulling in a few hundred Ks of salary. How do you market yourself to be more attractive than that?[/quote]

Are women really competing to marry men like this?  Why would anyone put up with this if they were capable of pulling in a few hundred KS of salary? At that point it makes absolute sense to me to save and plan for single parenthood ( as a PP suggested) while remaining open to finding the right  partner.[/quote]

I have no idea - I would have never gotten married or had kids with my husband if the deal hadn't been that we would both be 50% caretakers of the kids. Even at the beginning we did bottle feeding so he could participate. No way would I work the same amount of hours and make the same amount of money only to do more around the house or with the kids. Why anyone signs up for that deal is beyond me. [/quote]. You went to college, right?  You work in a professional career, right?  Did you ever learn about the economies of labor specialization? Did you ever actually sit down and  analyze what family division of labor not just child care but everything else that needs to be done, optimizes your family's overall utility function? Of course not because Ms. Magazine told your Mom and maw maw that god dammit child care needs to be split exactly 50/50 right down the middle or it's misogyny and the patriarchy.  It's both absurd and economically illiterate.[/quote]

Childcare isn't a 50/50 responsibility?  [/quote]

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