Reply to What do you do when your adult child goes into therapy and lays blame at your feet.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What's weird here is the charade that parents of adult kids suddenly  no longer engage in any sort of parenting/controlling behavior once their kids are 18, and that no parent-child power dynamic exists anymore.  Nothing magic happens when a kid turns 18.  Parents often continue to make demands, try to exert control, engage in unhealthy triangulation with other relatives, manipulate, etc.  This doesn't magically stop because the child is legally an adult.  My guess is that the parents so "shocked" that their adult child is "complaining" have never ceased to try to exert control over their child, and they continue to refuse to even try to be emotionally mature. [/quote]

There are plenty of parents that are disappointed in their adult children, they cause the parents a lot of pain and money into adulthood. Parents have their own regrets and shoulda-done this or that differently. Parents never stop loving their kids and wanting them to be happy. Therapy and self help should help achieve that, not finger pointing and blaming the parents. [/quote]

I mean, you're just making my point.  The dysfunctional relationship can continue into adulthood and parents are not magically exempt from their role because the child is an adult. [/quote]

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