Reply to BIL pissed that we won't be at his wedding

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "BIL pissed that we won't be at his wedding"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here with an update (although it's a bit low-key). DH resolved to do a quick trip to Australia (to keep the peace), but then a [b]situation arose at his work that meant being absent created a whole new bunch of difficulties[/b], so we were back to our original plans.

DH communicated all this to BIL ahead of his wedding, who was actually accepting of the situation (unlike earlier). DH has since spoken to his other brother, who you may recall was flying out to Australia anyway on vacation with his family. He attended the wedding and his report of the event was enlightening. He said it was a lovely occasion - exchange of vows in the garden - with just a handful of people BUT BIL was cagey about whether it was an "official" (ie legitimate) event and mentioned that they still had some paperwork to sort out. He had a friend officiating and the vows were "affirmations of commitment". So, we suspect that all the pressure he was piling on DH (and, by extension, FIL) was disingenuous. The event was clearly hastily arranged to coincide with other brother's visit and - to be charitable - maybe BIL was stressed about it all. Or - to be uncharitable - maybe it was all a power play

I was upset at the time about the pressure he was putting on DH, but have let that go. I find it harder to forgive how he used FIL to dripfeed more pressure. We will not mention any of this to FIL, as his memory slips and there seems no point in upsetting him.

Thanks to all who wished me a happy birthday: both events were wonderful as I was surrounded by my favorite people.

We have sent our good wishes to BIL and his partner (not sure if she is legally his wife yet) along with a "save the date" for the new year - FIL's 90th birthday. FIL is currently in good health and we hope he remains that way, so 
[/quote]

Your BIL is gross if a mans work commitments are a “legitimate” reason for missing something but his family commitments aren’t. Happy Birthday OP.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics