Reply to Are upper middle class family gatherings now just luxury travel pissing contests?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Are upper middle class family gatherings now just luxury travel pissing contests?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My family will skimp on clothes (no brand names), our furniture is from IKEA, we drive economy cars, but we love to travel. Our main hobbies are scuba diving, hiking and mountain biking. So yes, we will "brag" and so do our friends. I don't understand homebodies, one can see the world on any budget.[/quote]

Not any budget. Many people can barely afford to eat every day much less ever own a car and say they skimp by driving economy cars. I get your point even though your hobbies are somewhat expensive, but there are people that turn these activities into reflections that are tone deaf. Like the mom I met who said she appreciated the happiness of poor people and loveliness of being around animals after doing her 3rd safari tour staying in luxurious accommodations and being led by a guide.[/quote]

Why all the shaming? So the mom can travel to her 3rd safari, so what? Why is everyone so offended all of a sudden? Did she steal her travel money? Or she should've not gone anywhere and  "could've helped the less fortunate"?

Oh and "many people can barefly afford to eat every day"...no offense, but there are a lot of programs to feed the hungry. I regularly donate to our local food back and you should hear the stories about how picky some people are. There are free lunches at schools for those who qualify too.

Yes, my hobbies are expensive, I like them, I pay for them, I don't borrow or whine or b*** about how expensive things are. I'd rather travel the world than sit on my ass whining. [/quote]

It's not that. It's pretending you are very thrifty when you are only thrifty about some things and make up for it with luxury on others. You are discriminating with money, not thrifty just because you don't buy luxury everything. It's pretending that the people who greet you on Safari are happy being poor when it's literally their job to be happy and welcoming and likely they could be struggling a lot. It's romanticizing poverty and acting like you understand the people just because you met some of them at a tourist destination.

You sound tone deaf on the affordability of America and the world and not someone who can understand why not everyone can afford a trip if they just save a little bit buy not buying luxury for everything. [/quote] Ugh. So I should give up my "wants" to make you or the "rest of the world" feel better about themselves? So let's stop travel. Altogether. Let's make sure countries who live off hospitality industry don't make a dime off "the rich and spoiled and tone deaf" Americans or Europeans. By the way, how much are you donating to the poor? How are you fixing poverty? Don't be shy, it is an anonymous forum after all. [/quote]
Do you really think people believe you are counting change when you go on these exotic trips just because you don't buy a luxury car? Just own up that these are luxury items and have some understanding that not everyone can afford these or thinks you are special because you went on these trips. If you think you are more worldly than other family members just because you met some person on a mountain biking trip across the world that you could have just met at the metro here than that is being pretentious. I'm sure the people who like mountain biking find these trips much more interesting than the people who like other activities. You gained intelligence in mountain biking more than into other cultures. Gauge the room is all. You are probably just as bored at listening to the person who stayed here and did a staycation in DC as they are of your mountain biking trip in the alps. There is only so much that is relatable and that either party wants to hear. [/quote]

Yes, let's all sit quietly at the dinner table because someone will get offended that I went on a trip or that a cousin bought a car or that a nephew got into college. Let's all be quiet.[/quote]

You are being deliberately obtuse. There are ways to discuss these things without bragging. Do you really not know the difference? Or you just like arguing?[/quote]

Well, give me an example. "Susie, what are you doing for the holidays?" - Should I lie, stare at my food, not tell the truth of where I am going to make yourself feel better because you can't afford to go? I am dead serious, do you prefer that others lie about their lifestyles so that you are not offended?[/quote]

Them: What are you doing for the holidays?

You: We are taking the family to Costa Rica!

Them: Oh that's nice! What will you do there?

You: Visit the beach, do a zipline maybe. (This is the part where you don't need to give braggy details)

Them: Oh cool!

You: What about you guys? Will your mom be visiting again? (Change the subject back to them)

This is simply how polite, mannered conversation works. You do not talk too much about yourself.[/quote]

You do realize that even mentioning one is going somewhere nice can trigger "you are being uppity". Even something as simple as this.[/quote]

I know the feeling.  When I go downy Ocean, everybody thinks I’m bragging because I get a hotel right on the boardwalk, while they’re slummin’ it bayside.  You only live once, and if I’m walking distance to Thrasher’s French Fries, life’s good.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics