Reply to Are you offended when someone says they “didnt want someone else to raise my kids”?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a reason for why one spouse chose not to work or works from home/at a flexible part time job? Or is this an acceptable turn of phrase? [/quote]

It's an absolutely valid statement. Many of my friends didn't want their children to be raised by strangers, some had the privilege to do it themselves or get family to support while others had to send them to daycare or leave them with nannies.[/quote]

It might be shocking to the SAHP crew,  but have you ever considered it’s actually developmentally superior for a few hours of the day for the child not to be attached to the parent at the hip?[/quote]

SAH doesn't mean the kid is attached at the hip, just like going to child care doesn't mean neglect.[/quote]

I agree, which is why I don't think SAHP spend that much 1-1 time with kids, definitely not more than working parents.[/quote]

I'mthe pp you quoted.  I've done both, and disagree.  I definitely spent more time with ds as a SAHP.  Just the every day stuff like having lunch together, even running errands.  We were still together and interacting.  Those things couldn't happen when I was working.  Although there was my SIL.  A SAHP who had little to do with her kids.  At 3 & 4, they generally got up on their own.  Dry cereal and a sippy cup of milk was breakfast while they watched TV and SIL slept.  The whole day was them entertaining themselves.   [/quote]

Not really … your kids went to preschool right?

You weren't interacting 7 hours a day.[/quote]

NP. I was a SAHM when my kids were in preschool. My kids went to preschool for 3 hours a day 4 days a week. I was with them the rest of the day. My husband was gone for about 9 hours a day, 5 days a week. So I spent about 33 more hours with my kids per week than my husband did. No one said they interacted with their kids 7 hours a day. But don't try to argue that SAHPs don't spend that much more time with their kids than working parents. OF COURSE they do.[/quote]

Well my kids went to preschool 4 hours a day, plus an afternoon nap, plus my H was home with them in the am…, so no your kids did not spent a lot more time with you than they spent with us.

So H drop off at 9
9-1 preschool
1-1:30 in other care 2x a week (I did pu other 3)
Nap 1:30-3
Other care 3-4… which was a playdate 2x a week.

That &lt;5 hour difference 
[/quote]

Working mom and WTF id other care after 4 hour preschool? This schedule is bizarre and unnecessary and probably specific to a 12 month period. Most three year olds don’t take a 90 minute nap. You just seem really cheap and low achieving. No person with a demanding high paying job is splitting hairs about childcare like this. It’s so bizarre it’s either made up or you’re really poor. My husband and I make over $950K and no way we would put ourselves through this patchwork childcare he$&scape. And 10 hours of childcare is normal. Maybe none of you have real jobs with real commutes but most people do and no one is ogling 35 hours a week with a commute and getting out at 1 pm everyday. Are you grad students?[/quote]

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