Reply to S/O How do you justify having an affair?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I once asked DH what is that deal breaker, that one thing that would make you stray outside the marriage or even file for divorce.  Not money, not nagging, not hating his mother, but, sex life.  DH made it clear that he considers sex to be a huge asset in being married and would expect that his wife would value that as much as he does.  DH said it is the one thing we do that is just us and the one thing that holds us together spiritually and emotionally.  If he doesn't have that (and I agree) what's the point of staying in a relationship?  The intimate connection, go figure, I thought for sure he would say money.[/quote]

Yeah but then how do you explain the posters saying they have sex almost nightly at home? Must be different for everyone.[/quote]

Those posters are lying. [/quote]

Women perpetuate the myth that if she never says “no” and keeps it interesting that her husband will never stray.

Men perpetuate the lie that they have a dead bedroom when the AP questions why he’s stepping out.

No woman in her right mind would want to be a side piece to a guy that said he had regular sex with his wife (barring Brad Pitt or Pete Davidson).

My ex was able to have my complete trust and zero suspicion exactly because of our very healthy sex life, and obvious attraction for me —butt smacking, little grope walking buy, jumping in the shower with me, etc.

Women think oh if I “drain his pipes” before he flies out of town he won’t cheat.  Nope.  Marriages are long- 20+ years.

My ex cheated on his wah day…a day we had always had a long session in the morning…and still was able to get it up for her later the same day.

It ruined my ability to trust any instinct for the rest of my life.[/quote]

Oh god: I am sure your instincts are fine because your situation is a total outlier. It really is. You’re also appropriately seeing your DH as aberrant and the problem, which he is. All you need to do is not put Davidson in Pitt’s league! Your judgment is good!!![/quote]

Yeah.  He’s probably an outlier.  Not a sex addict but always had crazy high drive and zero performance issues.  He can make anyone feel like a million bucks.

It is frustrating to hear people think it’s not possible.  It’s basically an insult.  Though I know many really smart attractive women that are victims.[/quote]

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