Reply to 6th grade DD is being excluded from social events with longtime friends

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Reply to "6th grade DD is being excluded from social events with longtime friends"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Gotta love all the moms whose kids get dropped from a friend group and place blame on all the other kids and not look at their own child.  And they throw out queen b and mean girls to rationalize that your kid is “so innocent” but maybe your kid did some things or are nothing like the rest of the group. That the other moms forced the friendship and your kid had fake friends for years.  And now they are sick of mom engineered friend-based groups and moving on.

My youngest is high maintenance. I knew once Girl Scouts  and group activities would start falling off, her friendships would too. It sucked but I am not an idiot to know that my daughter isn’t the coolest to hang out with. She is immature, likes playing kid games, and is kinda loud. Most of the other girls stayed friends. My daughter eventually found her tribe and all was well. I would never ever ever place blame on other children and name call them like some of you nasty moms here. And I certainly wouldn’t let my daughter bad mouth anyone. I made her rise above. She is even friendly with 2 of them again now that they are in 8th grade and she has matured more to their level.

The throwing around bully, mean girls, and queen b on friendships that die once they can do their own things is embarrassing. Over-involved moms are the toxic ones.  [/quote]

Your parenting style is not one I would hold up as some exemplary style. Nor is your post one that demonstrates your ability to "rise above." I literally laughed when read that, given how judgy, smug, and bit---y your post is.[/quote]

I read it as a realistic parent who understands social dynamics.  One of my children can be difficult in many ways.  We have seen him drive friends away with behaviors over the years.   There are times he matures and then people want to hang out again.  It’s natural.  You don’t blame anyone and understand friendships change.  At times, we have also tried to help our son see how certain things can be a turn off in social groups as he got older.  Really it was a matter of time and maturity.  [/quote]

+1 I’m with the PP, too.[/quote]

I agree.  I don’t think we do our kids any favors by treating these situations as it’s always someone else’s fault.  There is always room to be self-aware and take a good look at one’s own personality and behavior and as parents we should teach our kids to do this and that it’s normal and healthy to do this.  Not in a self-flagellating way but in a what have I learned about myself along the way.[/quote]

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