Reply to S/O Why do you care if moms stay home?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]SAHM here.

I hate these threads. They're usually started by a WOHM asking some version of "why don't you want to work a flexible job and not be dependent on a man?"

So you explain how your former industry was not flexible, why you and your husband prize a peaceful, calm existence where one person works and the other takes care of home and kid stuff, and what you have done to mitigate the risk of being financially dependent (large cash savings, continue to invest for your own retirement, large life insurance and disability policies, post nuptial agreements, etc. etc.) and they come back with "well it's not about YOU or your reasons, it's about women in general."

Don't you get that ALL women are making choices based on their unique circumstances and are making good choices mitigating risk in their lives?

Like sorry your dad left your mom high and dry but that's not going to happen to me for various reasons and no amount of bitter wishing on your part is going to make it so. It's just not. If my husband left me tomorrow, which is extremely unlikely for various reasons, I'd walk away with about 3 million dollars. A nice cushion to start over with.[/quote]

+100

I’m at home right now. It’s not forever but I’m REALLY happy at home and a 100% better parent when I’m not giving so much of my mental energy and time to corporate America. My dd is doing better than she was when I was at work and we’re all less stressed. I’m not concerned about getting back into the workforce even though I know I’ll encounter bitter women who don’t want to let me back in because I took time off. But I’ll get back in anyways. (And I only judge those who are arguing that their way of staying at work is the right way for everyone and society at large.) I have several girlfriends who are much happier parents because they have fulfilling jobs to go to and I’m glad they have that option and that MOST people don’t judge them for working and putting their kids in daycare. It’s nice to have choices and it saddens me that so many families in this country don’t actually have many choices or career flexibility. I use my vote to help change that but I won’t give up my ability to choose in the name of solidarity. That’s so ass backwards.

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