Reply to Just got yelled at for leaving my kid alone in in the car while I went to the pharmacy

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Let’s remember there’s not some magical thing that happens upon midnight on a child’s 8th birthday.  They are not sprinkled with fairy dust and determined to be safe at that time.  [/quote]

I mean, the magical thing that happens is they can legally be left alone. It’s sort of like the magic about drinking when you turn 21. [/quote]

Right. So some of us actually get be our kid's alcohol before they turn 21, even though it's illegal, specifically because we want to teach them about alcohol and how to create name it responsibly before they are 21 yr old college kids.

Like some of us want to be able to guide and prepare our kids for increasing levels of independence and responsibility. Leave them in a car alone for 3 minutes in a pharmacy parking lot with a security guard  in a safe neighborhood while I run inside. Give a 17 yr old a half glass of wine with dinner on vacation so they can learn how alcohol impacts them in a safe environment. These laws don't help you actually raise kids. A drinking and of 21 is idiotic and we all know it-- kids legally can't drink until they've been adults for 3 years? What? A 7 year old can't wait in outside in a car fir a few minutes? These are nonsensical provisions for good patents because obviously part of parenting is slowly introducing your child to greater levels of independence and responsibility. You have to TEACH kids how to be in the world. They don't magically gain this knowledge on their birthday.[/quote]

Mydh and my family is riddled with alcoholics so no I did not encourage them to 'belly up to the bar'  there is need for alcohol.  I've seen too many lives ruined.  Same for pot and other drugs.

You can teach independence but not this way.[/quote]

My parents were like this (zero tolerance on drugs and alcohol) because they had parents who were alcoholics and it didn't work-- both my brothers developed substance abuse issues and also just lied to my parents constantly because they knew they'd get in trouble if they revealed they'd been drinking or using drugs.

Meanwhile I know families who allowed older teems small points of alcohol at family functions starting around 15 or so, and had family discussions about alcohol use and talked through how to keep yourself from drinking too much and also how to decline drinking at all in situations like when you are driving or you just don't want to. The kids in these families became responsible adults with functional attitudes toward alcohol and other substances.

[b]In general I think it's better to introduce kids to new responsibilities slowly over time instead of all at once.[/quote][/b]

Your examples are not my experience.  My kids also have lifelong medical conditions and were told not to drink because it would interfere with their medication.  There are many examples where parents 'introduce alcohol and drugs' to their kids and their kids become alcoholics and drug addicted people.

So to counteract your stories none of my siblings are alcoholics or drug addicted and yet we were NOT introduced to it early.  I personally don't care what your family choses to do but please don't think that you're way is the only way.  And you can think that my way is wrong too.  I don't care.  Alcohol is not needed and does so much damage. I pretty much never drink and I never miss it.  [/quote]

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