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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is wild to me. I’m a physician who gets through 14 hour shifts in the hospital with no problem. But when I’m not seeing patients and have a day off at home, you bet I nap. If my spouse told me I couldn’t nap on vacation I would say I’ll see you when you get back, enjoy the beach. [/quote]

Is your spouse a stay at home ?

Sounds like it because you expect to do what you want when you want.   When kids are little, their needs come first.

You sound very entitled.[/quote]

Yeah, we all work hard, Doc. You just get paid better. Be a better husband and father, please.[/quote]

Nice try ladies. I’m the DW. Husband is a fed.

Jesus. Who needs men to hold us back with you two around?[/quote]

Observing that a particular woman's behavior could stand improvement is not an attack on sisterhood[/quote]

Who said anything about an attack? Both posters assumed I was a man. The casually confident bias (from mothers, raising children, no less) from both posters is just as damaging to the idea of equality, moreso in fact, because they don’t even know they’re doing it.

Re: the actual topic at hand, our family functions the way most common sense-oriented posters on this thread have suggested. We do fun activities in the morning; by afternoon everyone gets to do what they want. [b]If that means my husband and I take shifts so someone can get some downtime that’s what we do.[/b] That’s what I would suggest for OP to do (rather than multiple pages of debating the merits of a nap on vacation). Having one parent “check out” every afternoon would be unacceptable no matter what the activity was. Vacation is supposed to be relaxing for everyone. But since my only original point was that napping on vacation is OK, I will stand by that point.

Because I’m sure you are as aware of the statistics of parenting as I am, I am more than an involved parent, in fact, I’m the default, like most moms. I still nap. Worry about your own behavior![/quote]

That's reasonable, but it seems like OP doesn't want to trade off with her husband; she wants everybody doing the same activity together 24/7.  [/quote]

Yes, and I think this is the crux of the issue. Posters seem to fall into 2 camps: either 24/7 togetherness on vacay or not. I’m in the “not” camp (I’m the doc/napper :)) but my family of origin is in the constant togetherness camp and it drove me nuts growing up.

I maintain that OP’s issue is 2-fold; a difference in vacation styles, and one parent checking out. It’s fine for DH to nap but he’s gotta give OP a break as well, and he also needs to suck it up and go on the Catamaran outing or whatever (and not pout; this is crucial). [/quote]

Just to be mathematical about it, 24/7 togetherness for the whole family isn't possible unless they're sharing a room. Peel off the hour when people are asleep or showering and it probably doesn't count as 24 hours together for parents and kids.

That much togetherness would still be too much for me, but I think the OP's spouse's two hours is

a lot if it's interfering with things the kids want them to do as a family (because certain activities aren't available during the morning) and/or if OP wants but doesn't get downtime
perfectly reasonable if everyone is having fun without him

I can't figure out whether OP's main objection is that the kids want to spend time with their dad, whose primary concern is getting what he wants or if her complaint stems from some notion of How Vacation Should Be. If it's the latter, she needs to get past it. [/quote]

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