Reply to I think I win the Thanksgiving 2023 petty vents already

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "I think I win the Thanksgiving 2023 petty vents already"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mother, sister, niece and nephew were scheduled to come and spend the night on Thursday with us. The kids are my kids only cousins and we never see them because my sister never makes them available. My mother also lives 1 mile from my sister and is totally enmeshed in their lives (picks the kids up from school regularly, babysits them, does all sorts of activities with them, etc..they see each other daily). Also my mother owns the house my sister lives in (just some background info).

My mother calls last night (Wednesday) and said she’s sorry but they won’t be making it because my sister thinks it’s too much for her kids to deal with having their cousins and sharing the attention of my mother. Her kids at 10 and 8, I have teens. My mother said it wouldn’t work for them after all and to have a Happy Thanksgiving. I asked my mother if she would come then by herself and she said no, she couldn’t leave my sister alone on Thanksgiving.

I hung up and cried. [/quote]

This is awful! What is the background here? Why would they ditch you right before the holiday? (Not that there is a good reason for this). Wishing you a peaceful holiday PP, for you and your teens. [/quote]

I don’t know what kind of background explains it but my mother will pick my sister 10 times out of 10 because “she needs me more”. They’re 100% codependent, and my sister has admitted to me that it works out well for her that my mother drops everything and does stuff for her. I’ve been firm with my sister about her interfering with the relationship between my parents and my kids and she just said “sorry but I’m not going to change because I like having all the support so no”. I mean she actively interferes whenever I am with my mother (calling with “emergencies” so my mother leaves and goes to her, stuff like that) and most of the time my mother lies when she’s seeing my kids and tells my sister she’s doing something else so my sister “doesn’t get her feelings hurt”. My sister is 44.

I would grey rock or whatever it’s called but I have 2 kids who don’t have any other grandparents since my father passed and they repeatedly ask why their grandmother doesn’t come to events or games or plays or to our house like their friends.  My mother lives 90 min away. We’d go to her but whenever we do she says she’s busy when we arrive so we end up having to entertain ourselves and just drive back. I stopped doing that. I don’t know what to tell people. My sister is horrible. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics