Reply to What do you do when your adult child goes into therapy and lays blame at your feet.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I suspect that confronting a parent with complaints from childhood is more an effort to spread the pain around than a remedial effort.

Adult child: You were not the parent I wanted and I am angry at you.

Parent: I am sorry that you feel that way, I didn't try to make you unhappy in your childhood. What can I do for you now?

Adult child: Nothing you can do. No apology will make me feel better.

Parent: Then why are you complaining to me.

Adult child: I want to you feel as miserable as I do.

Parent: I do.

Adult child: That's not enough!

[/quote]

Now let's flip the script....

Parent: You are not the young adult I wanted you to be and I am angry at you.

Adult child: I am sorry that you feel that way, I didn't try to make you unhappy in your old age. What can I do for you now?

Parent: Nothing you can do. No apology will make me feel better.

Adult child: Then why are you complaining to me?

Parent: I want to you feel as miserable about you as I do.

Adult child: I do.

Parent: That's not enough!
[/quote]

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