Reply to Let's talk 9th grade social life

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "Let's talk 9th grade social life"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you are all missing the point that MANY kids socialize via phone these days. I don't think it has much at all to do with ADHD. Honestly, I don't.

My daughter was the same way as a freshman. Kids get overwhelmed with HW, sports/activities run much later, and many kids still do club sports and other obligations on the weekend. Sadly, if they socialize on IG, Snap or group texts, they are fulfilling friendship needs. We may not see it that way but our parents didn't think hanging out a mall or arcade for a few hours doing "nothing" constituted as much.  And honestly, parents are always busy too.

OP, I say you offer a sleepover at your house. Just a few girls. It will give you a better idea.

Another thought is her friend group is changing. My daughter didn't want to be in the trying to impress group in HS. Some did. Friendships fade out. New ones will start. Totally normal

Lastly, check her phone  a little. See what's up. [/quote]

I think it's absolutely true that kids socialize via phone.  However, what parents of kids with ADHD are saying is that our kids share a common and somewhat unique experience of difficulty planning activities outside of school and sometimes difficulty with friendships.

OP, your post was extremely familiar to me --- DS having friends at school that he very much wanted to turn into "outside school" friends, but really, really struggling to do that.  He has anxiety in addition to ADHD and I think was really very nervous about texting or calling kids to try to set something up.  Also, he tends to find the process that teens use (group chats, instagram) incredibly frustrating and pretty quickly decides that the fun of hanging out is not worth the frustration of trying to plan.

What helped him a ton was being in activities (sports teams) with kids and then making plans after events.  Also, being able to just hang out after school or casually meet kids at the park to play basketball seems to make things much easier.

What we notice about ADHD in both me and DS is a very low threshold of irritation with anything that involves changing something already planned and a kind of low frustration threshold generally.    That makes it hard to be a good friend sometimes.  9th grade is probably too young for your DD to recognize that (I know that my DS always refuses to acknowledge that any issue is ADHD related, even when it clearly is), but if you can help work on frustration that could help.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics