Reply to What is wrong with my mother?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here, and I spent the last 20 minutes writing an email to my step-MIL, outlining the seriousness of my issues with my mother in an effort to get her to understand why I have these boundaries in place, and why it is important that I maintain them.

It was cathartic to write it... but should I bother sending it? It's a kind and respectful email, FWIW. [/quote]
 
Delete it!  Its not your place to put your step-mil in the middle of it.  Your mom may have had a bad childhood and is just trying to survive by latching on to any man that will provide the basics rather than a "good" man.  [/quote]

OP here, and I probably won't send it, but... she put herself in the middle by 1) inviting my mother to come stay with her for extended visits after I limited her visits with me, and 2) taking me to lunch to try to further welcome my mother into my life. [/quote]

Picture me, singing loudly. BOUNDARIES!  OP, you need boundaries with your mom AND your stepmom.  Her relationship with her mother is not your relationship with your mother. "You don't know everything Jane, and it's not an appropriate discussion for us to have. You'll have to respect this boundary."[/quote]

Thanks. It's just that it puts me in a very awkward position when my mother is staying with my step-MIL, 20 minutes away from me. Then, she will come to our house for 3 days, the length of time we have allowed her to stay... only to pack back up and go to my step-MIL's. 20 minutes away.

I guess you're right though, it's not my problem. [/quote]

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