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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The first time?  About 4 months to truly move on and not have it enter my mind uninvited.  The second time?  About 6 months.  The third?  Never.  Divorce pending.  And those 3 times were just the tip of the iceberg, I am sure.  Knowing what I know now?  I would go with never right from the start.  The person who gave himself permission to disregard your feelings, your vows, your health in order to have some strange?  Even if that person never, ever cheats again ... he is a person who does not hold you dear.  Sort of like untreated alcoholics who stop drinking are still alcoholics underneath ... you spend the rest of your life waiting for the other shoe to drop.  And it usually does.

I know we all like to think that human emotions are mushy, nuanced and never black and white.  But cheating on your spouse requires lots of planning, doing, and then covering up.  Just one act of betrayal involves MANY lies ... and each lie is a hurtful action in itself.  There really isn't any grey area when it comes to cheating.[/quote]

4 months is all?? Was it a ONS? or a LTA? 4 months???[/quote]

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