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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. There is, of course, more to this story. My mom is very, very touchy. She likes to gossip. She uses events like this to pump me for personal information that she can then talk about ad nauseum for months. If I deflect for very long, she gets her feelings hurt. So, even an hour or two of one-on-one time is unpleasant, because she gets angry that I'm not telling her about my deepest hopes and fears, or my husband's problems, or gossiping about my in-laws, or saying catty things about people.

We spend most of our time together with my children, and I would like to keep it that way. We do occasionally have lunch together or something, but that's as much as I'm willing to do.

I suspect she knows as much, and keeps bringing up the shopping to eventually force me to either go or to say something that will hurt her feelings. I just want to make her drop it.

Over the years (I'm 44, she's 71), we have had plenty of conversations about why we aren't close. She doesn't agree with my version of things, or, I guess, feels that the past is the past (even if it was just last week), and we should act like we're Lorelai and Rory. [/quote]

Me, is that you?  :)  Hang in there OP.  Do what you need to do, and that will give her something to gossip and b!tch about to others, so you'll be a good daughter that way.  She'll adjust.  [/quote]

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