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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am sorry OP. I used to not accept who my parents were. Then, as my own child started to grow a bit older, I started to realize how much effort it took them to do things for us that I am now trying to do for my child. Like, Mom made sure I learned a foreign language early on. or that I was prepared to start school and was one of the best in class. My dad would take long walks with my brother and I, where we could talk about all kinds of stuff - he told us things related to history, literature, and just life. 
I am starting to slowly accept them for who they are and letting go of the things they couldn't/wouldn't do for us. They never helped us out financially, dressed us very poorly, and didn't understand a lot of our struggles. But it is so, so hard to be a perfect parent. I am better at some things than they are, while they were better at other things. 
I am not saying you shouldn't feel the way you feel, but I wish you could come to terms with your own dreams and expectations from your parents. [/quote]

I know they did the best they could with their life experience. I always had low or minimal expectations from them. I always had to fend for myself, and in some ways it's made me quite resourceful and independent. However I guess at some point I started comparing with my friends parents, especially in times of need, and as they say- comparison is the thief of joy.[/quote]

I used to compare, too, so I get it. I cannot give you a recipe as to how to make it go away, but somehow it just did. I did see a counselor a few years back on an unrelated issue, but she told me it all boils down to your relationship with your parents. So maybe it is a side effect of that counseling?
It's like I grew up and I don't need them anymore. I don't want to talk to them very much, but make a point of calling them every time I think about something they did with gratitude. Otherwise, I don't, really. [/quote]

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