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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is OP.

One girl came across as too serious and harsh when she was younger and when I knew her, did not make much effort to date. She did not work out much either and is not nearly as well groomed and dressed as she is today. She was also very competitive with men. I recall she treated her male colleagues as competition rather than potential love interests.. [/quote]

OP you have described me to a T :). Im Indian - a huge commitment phobe, absolutely focused on my studies and career in my twenties and early thirties. In my early thirties i woke up (I always wanted to have children) and looked around and found that the men I was attracted to did not give me the time of the day - for all the reasons you mentioned.

I went back to the drawing board, worked on softening my personality, toning down the competitive edge and being (ggahh) girly and sweet and of course spent a small fortune on beauty and fashion. It worked (well sort of - one broken engagement that i got cold feet on) and I got married at 37 to a colleague of mine.

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