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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]And its their bedtime.

Backstory:  I have the luxury of a VERY flexible work schedule.  I do most of my work from home and when I do leave home to work, I can take my kids with me, as I own my company.  For financial reasons, we didn't put our kids in camp this summer, so they've been with me since school let out.

There are 4 of them, all over age 5, which is great.  But.

I'm worn out.  My husband works VERY long hours, so I'm pretty much on my own 80-90% of the time.  I'm spent.  He just got home at 7:30, as did we, because we were both working all day (me with the kids).  I told him I needed to go out and run a few errands (grocery store and to drop off some things to a friend's house in the neighborhood) and he said he didn't understand why I couldn't just do it in the morning.  I explained that it so much easier to do these things without the kids and since he is working all day tomorrow I'd like to get it done without taking along what feels like 500 snacks, refereeing kid fights, etc..

He thinks its no big deal to take them from place to place, but honestly, it rarely happens these days.... maybe once a week.  My comment to him was, "You have no idea how hard it is.  You wouldn't be able to do what I'm doing every single day."

That was clearly the wrong thing to say, because he walked away and 5 minutes later said, "Let's go kids."   They were all in their pajamas ready for bed, and as they were getting in the car, he looked at me and said, "I can't do what you do, right?" very sarcastically.  I felt so bad for so many reasons, but I felt the worst for my 5 year old boy who was very tired, ready for bed and confused as to why Daddy was taking them all out at this time of evening when they're usually winding down for bed.

I wanted to tell him he's an asshole, but I just gave the kids kisses and told them I'd see them in a little bit.

So.  What to do from here?  I realize I offended my husband with my comment.  I didn't mean to make him feel "less than" but I obviously did.

On the other end, how in the hell does he not get that I am beyond exhaustion?  I sure as hell didn't need him to take the kids at night when they're ready for bed... that's when things are nice and quiet anyway.  I get a bit of a break then.  All I really needed to do was get my shit done without the kids.  What did him leaving with them solve?

Help.  I need some other perspectives.

Flame away if need be.  TIA.
[/quote]

You absolutely shouldn't have said what you did to him. That's relationship communication  101.

So what do you need to do you need to reevaluate things with your business.  Of course the kids are difficult when they have to be at mommy's job all day.  So you need to figure out a way to hire    some part time help .  A worker for you and  a babysitter for you and the kids. Ideally you would hire both, but if you can only pick one do so. P

You and your husband need marriage counseling. There are some issues between the two of you communication is  a big one and you guys need to figure out how to communicate better before you do permanent relationship damage. You need to find a  division of labor where no one fells completely downtrodden or disrespected for their contributions.

Mayb also parenting  classes  your kids are over  5  they should be able to help out  a little more around the house  and if needed manage a trip to the grocery store without 500 snacks and constant fighting, but maybe   not being at work all day with you would help that.
You cannot do everything.  Attempting to be superwoman/supermom  does no one any favors including yourself.

I'm sure you support HRC  and the First LAdy as accomplished as these ladies are they readily admit they had help. Why should you be any different?[/quote]

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