Reply to If you have high expectations of your spouse, but they have not panned out

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My husband just took a new job with a 50% pay cut to what is basically a starting salary.  He did not discuss it with me.  I make 3x what he does and will now have to take on a second job to make ends meet.

When we married, he was at an Ivy League grad school and was working on his PhD.  But he never applied all of that potential.  Now he's hoping to coast through the next 15 years to retirement.

We are seeking different goals.  He wants low key, living 2 hours from DC.  I want to move in closer, cut down my commute, enjoy the cultural things the city has to offer.  But first we need to pay off the $100k of student loans.  I'm deeply disappointed it worked out this way.

I'm probably the person you hear bitching about her spouse.  Although I feel my grievances are justified, reading this, I feel embarrassed.  Gonna put my head down, work more, and muster more bootstraps and all that mumbojumbo.[/quote]

You are not wrong to want more than your husband, but I think it's unfair to expect him to fashion his career to suit your objectives. It sounds like he has a decent job and is happy with a modestly comfortable life.

You should divorce him so you can marry Mr. Big, and he can be with someone who respects him, but ill bet you won't because you don't want him to have the upper hand in a divorce.[/quote]

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