Reply to Guidance Needed - ADHD kid, family life, struggling to get on same page with DH

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[quote=Anonymous]I also have a DH with ADD and a kid with dyslexia and a job with travel. My DH is much like yours when he is overwhelmed - he shuts down, and it really looks like laziness. He sleeps a ton, disappears to his man cave to play video games, all while I am madly trying to keep the balls in the air. It makes me crazy and very, very angry. It has gotten better as our one kid has gotten older and the demands of kid-care have gotten less all encompassing. Maybe part of what is up with your DH is the exhaustion early childhood years - you have a baby, right? Not that it helps anything, but it hopefully will get better with time.

Things we do: calendar on the fridge, and I add everything I can think of. We often stand in the kitchen together in the morning and look at it. DH always forgets to add his stuff, and so there is inevitably the times when he says "oh, I have to do x tomorrow," and we realize it conflicts with Y. He deals with his own fall out - I don't cover for him. But I do all the organizing of camps, playdates, make doctors appts, etc., and then DH schleps DS to them.

And do get the dyslexia testing. As another PP said, dyslexia and ADHD are very often comorbid. My kid and I both have straight up dyslexia without the ADHD, and for me it was deeply hurtful and shameful and made my childhood pretty difficult. When I saw my son struggle in 1st grade, starting to say things like "I'm just dumb," "reading just isn't for me," "I'll never be a scientist because I can't do math," my heart broke. Dyslexia HURTS. My kid is older now, had a few years of tutoring, and is doing really well. Still dyslexic, but fabulous kid. I'm sure your kid is going to do great, too. So are you. Hang in there.[/quote]

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