Reply to If you have high expectations of your spouse, but they have not panned out

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes I've gotten caught in conversations where wives complain about their DHs professionally (and once where a DH complained about his wife professionally). It's all kinds of awkward and there's nothing a stranger/casual friend can say.

I'm in law, so I always here some variation of -- I married him expecting he'd make biglaw partner and he didn't; I married him expecting that he'd get a biglaw job and now I realize he works for Joe Schmoe & Associates not bc he wants to but bc that's all his T4 degree pedigree gets him - I wish he had been honest; or I never pushed him for partnership but I married him expecting at least 8 yrs of biglaw money that we'd use to pay down/off a house and he "burnt out" in 2 yrs and is now happy in a 120k gov't job -- this isn't what I signed up for to be living out in Lorton.[/quote]

Ha! My wife openly resents the fact that I'll never get a sniff at making $120k. And I'm the only one in the house who is OK with the chain link fence. I give her the shrug and move on.[/quote]

I make $140K as a Fed and have over $1 million saved and/or invested and DW constant bitches that I'm a loser. We visit friends with huge houses and she complains that we should have a big house "like that." She wants a new car and wants it to be MB. U don't value either big showy houses not a flashy car. I told her she is more than welcome to these things if she wants to pay for them herself. I'm completely happy with the small house in the close in burbs and a Honda Accord.

People explain the difference in our approach to money as cultural. I am WASP and she is from Eastern Europe.  The car and the house are in her culture status symbols. Me? I know status can't be bought.

And I too would be happy with the chain link fence![/quote]

First generation OP here.  I am thinking that many, many cultures (mine included - considered Middle Eastern by most) think that the U.S. has streets paved with gold.  Maybe not literally, but consider pop culture's depiction of the U.S. (ex: The Kardashians, pro ball players and rappers lifestyle, etc.). The message sent is not accurate, but some people are not wise enough to realize. [/quote]

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