Reply to I don't know how to process this fight/anger with my husband

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[quote=Anonymous]Op, you sound a little lazy: you want a PT nanny, a housekeeper, to sleep in on Sundays, and you don't want to/can't work.

It's OK to be lazy when you can throw money at the problem, but it sounds like money is tight and you're still trying to live the lifestyle you were when you had double the HHI, and no child.

Things changed: your HHI was cut in half, and you moved far away, and you had a baby. You can't afford to be lazy right now, so something has to give. Which is probably what your DH is trying to say.

I get up early on Saturday mornings to clean the house for two hours while DH entertains DS. On Sunday mornings, I take DS while DH does the exterior maintenance or plays handyman. It's not the leisurely life we enjoyed pre-kids, but it's what needs to be done for the short term.

You and your husband need to sit down today, during naptime and discuss allocation of resources: financial, time, and human, and come up with a way you can pay the bills, care for the house, care for your child, and engage in reasonable (and equitable) "me" time. Come up with the plan together, and be willing to sacrifice a little in light of your new financial situation, and there will be less resentment/fighting.[/quote]

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