Reply to how to get my mom to "drop it"

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[quote=Anonymous]You got some great advice on this specific situation OP.  But I wanted to share my two cents based on having to figure out how to set/maintain boundaries w/ a difficult parent and siblings.  I had all of it pretty well under control until I had my kids (also twins.)

I want my kids to have good relationships w/ their grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, but there are LOTS of minefields involved.

But what helps me is changing my thinking to reflect my new responsibilities.  My job is to build a home and family life for my kids (and me and my husband) that is loving, safe, calm, stable, and nurturing.  I go about allowing or seeking or limiting relationships w/ my more challenging family members ONLY to the extent that it works within the primary guidelines for my nuclear family.

Viewing what I need to do (and who I need to be) in terms of what is best for my nuclear family has really helped me be more clear in my limits, and more able to enforce boundaries.

Just a thought...[/quote]

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