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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Interesting thread to me. [b]My husband and I are footing our daughter's college life at more than $60,000 a year. She wanted an apartment so we stipulated that if we visited we get to crash on her sofa. [/b]She agreed but the one and only time we visited she suggested we stay in a hotel. I'm thinking of saying the same to her if she ever comes back. My DH and I just think it's fun to share her life for a little bit. We aren't trying to intrude. We don't need to be comfortable. We need to be with her for a period of time that  feels like we are still family. Maybe this isn't about money but acceptance? OP, would you be insulted if they asked you to stay in a hotel when you visit? Do your parents stay in a hotel? If they do then mention this in a positive manner and maybe he IL's will rethink their place.[/quote]

PP, I think your situation is different than what the OP is experiencing - you are paying your daughter's expenses and made staying in the apartment you are paying for a condition up front. That's different than expecting adult children who are completely financially independent to host, even when there isn't room to host. 
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