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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.

To clarify, we all live in DC/NOVA and get together at least once a month, if not more often. My MIL has no daughter and always wished that she did, so my SIL (who is also my DH's SIL) asked her to host the shower (this is her first grandkid). SIL's mom and sisters (who are all in DC/NOVA areas) are helping and very hands-on, so I wasn't involved in the planning.

DH just talked to his brother (not related to this) and in the conversation he asked if I was coming to the shower, so it's more likely that she simply forgot. I really hope that's the case. It is possible that she assumed I'm coming any way and didn't bother sending an invitation (just like the wedding). But I wasn't informed about the time/date/location of the shower. I don't like confrontations, so I didn't ask about it, either (I probably should have).
 
Either way, she should know by now that I didn't get the invitation and that it hurt my feelings. I really hope I get an email or a message apologizing for a blunder, so that I can put all this behind.

DH said he will talk to his mom to explains the situation so that she wouldn't wonder why I didn't show up.

God, in-law relationships are always so complicated!

[/quote]

It's actually not complicated for people who are willing to be grown-ups and communicate directly, which you still do not seem to be doing. You seem to be focused on feeling hurt/slighted, when there are a million reasons why they may just assume you're going. It could be an honest misunderstanding/mistake on their part, and here you are "hoping" she'll feel bad and apologize. GROW UP! Just pick up the phone and call your MIL, the hostess!

And let's clear up another point: it doesn't matter that MIL always wanted a daughter. Mother's don't host showers for their daughters, period. Friends of the family usually do that. MIL hosting for DIL is a bit of an etiquette stretch, honestly, but it is "done" these days.[/quote]

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