Reply to Is it Fair to Say That Both Parties Are to Blame in the Demise of a Marriage?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Is it Fair to Say That Both Parties Are to Blame in the Demise of a Marriage? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Thoughts? If one party has an affair and the other party is hurt and angry over it and the hurt and anger eventually cause the breakup? Now it is just as much to do with the hurt party?[/quote]

I think yes.

There were reasons there was an affair, usually. I would think that most people wouldn't have an affair if their marriage was going well. If things are humming along and everybody is happy ... nobody has an affair. (usually)

It might not be apparent at first glance, but I think there usually is a reason that that [i]space [/i]was there that allowed the affair. I am not blaming the spouse who was cheated on. The affair isn't their fault. But the state of the marriage [i]before [/i]the affair is. Even if they thought things were PERFECT

It seems to me that a lot of cheated upon wives act all surprised, as if their marriages were perfect, delicious, amazing, before they found their husband cheating. They are so surprised and profess they were the perfect,  loving, giving wife. Their marriage was roses and petunias.

Maybe.

But maybe not. I'm not saying they deserve to be cheated upon. But something in the marriage was really fundamentally wrong. Sex. Communication. Long held hurts. The affair really is just a symptom. A really really painful symptom. But a symptom.

[/quote]

Statistically that is not correct. People in happy marriages report having affairs at the same rate as those in unhappy marriages.

You do realize that people who are happily married have affairs, right? or are you of the misconception that only people in unhappy marriages have affairs?[/quote]

Eh. I believe they say they are happily married. But I think if you dig deeper there is (usually) more challenge then people let on.  But all of the above is just my opinion, I can't cite anybody.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics