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[quote=Anonymous]I agree with the other posters that spouses need to choose each other above all others, with the exception of dependent children.  And even in those cases, you can care for a child without being disloyal to your spouse.

It sounds like you were very much in the wrong for backing your dad into a corner and forcing him to "choose".   What exactly were you forcing him to choose between in the particular instance that caused the rift?

Your dad is married for life.  It is very sad that your parents' marriage ended in divorce, and it sounds like it caused you a lot of pain, and that is very sad.  Your dad is now remarried.  If you love him and your sister, the loving thing is to root for the happiness and success of his marriage.

So how do you resolve this pain you are in?  One thing is to be honest about what you really want and ask whether it's realistic or good.  To be honest with you in an anonymous forum, it sounds like you want your father to divorce again and it sounds like you want your sister to be unhappy because you are unhappy and it's unfair that she gets two intact, doting, loving parents and you feel excluded from that.

What if you told your dad, "Dad, I still really hurt because you and mom broke up.  I am really jealous of my sister because she gets 100% of your love and I feel like your love for me is divided.  I want to be closer to you and to feel more a part of your family.  What can I do on my part to help us to be closer?  Would you be willing to work with me on this?"

Could you say that?[/quote]

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