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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - thanks for the input, everyone.  It just seems so incongruous that I want to have sex with someone who has been so horrible to me by having the affair.  But I like sex these days and I'll be damned if I slide back into my old low-drive, kind of repressed way just because he was an asshole.  It is also bonding us a bit, though, as I mentioned, it makes me sick to think he was with another woman during our marriage.  It appears there were actually times when we would have sex in the morning and he would go hook up with her at night - which is totally insane to me.  I am going to just go with it for now and stop if it makes me feel wrong.  I am trying to work things out because we have two little kids and I think it's worth a shot to see if this is something we can overcome, but I am not blindly thinking that we can just be happy and I know that this might end up being too much for me.  I just don't know now.

I found out about his affair because he talked about a certain coworker in a strange manner.  So, after a few months, I flat out asked him if he was cheating on me and he admitted it and claimed he had ended it a few weeks before I asked (I know, I know).  He appears on the surface to be super remorseful, but I am definitely not just taking him at his word.  [/quote]

You both need couples therapy now. The healing hasn't begun yet and the tone of your post shows that your distrust is actually growing.[/quote]

OP here - we are in couples therapy.  We were in it while he was having the affair, so there's that.  I don't think my distrust is growing.  I am just trying to not just give in to the impulse to automatically believe everything he says and sweep everything under the rug.  That impulse is very strong because I don't want my marriage to break up, but I also am trying to be honest with myself and it is just rational to take things he says with a grain of salt these days when he was lying to me for months during the affair.[/quote]

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