Reply to SIL lost baby at 20 weeks, we were due 2 weeks apart

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Reply to "SIL lost baby at 20 weeks, we were due 2 weeks apart"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]PP, it's ridiculous to be comparing pains here, trying to find a winner like it's a competition.  Someone else could say you're horrible for comparing a still birth to a "child that died".  I.e., don't compare a stillbirth to the loss of a child you knew, loved, raised, etc.

Just stop.

- Not the poster(s) you are talking to[/quote]

I won't stop.  It sicks to say that infertility is on the same level as losing a baby. [/quote]

Not that it matters because I believe pain is pain when it comes to honest to god tragedies and accidents but I think that the PP was saying that the woman went through years of treatment for IF and then lost a baby late term? And therefore couldn't get pregnant again in 18 months?

Not sure. Also, to pose a question to think about- not trying to be insensitive just genuinely curious, do you think that there is a reasonable 'time limit' (wrong words but not sure how to phrase it) for family and friends to be expected to be supportive to the extent of walking on eggshells? I think that is obviously the initial needed reaction, almost over think everything with caution because why cause more pain?! Should that always be the case? Is it ever something that can become a burden though that is not healthy for either party any more? And when? I mean there is no right answer but I could see how it could cause serious family issues and be very unhealthy for the mom suffering the loss even to no longer be able to attend holidays or happy times 3,5, 10 years down the road from this tragedy. Almost like it then defines the whole family dynamic. Just something I am wondering about.

I do not have family that have experienced this but sadly do have family friends who have experienced loss of an older or adult child, its all so sad.[/quote]

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