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[quote=Anonymous][quote]I think it's time to let this fight happen. You need to clearly define what is in the realm of your responsibility and what's not.

"Why haven't you found her a nice boy?" 
 "because there's match.com and eharmony and I have other responsibilities, like raising my kids."

"why you don't ask your friends to include her more?" 
 "I'm a little focused on my own life and kids to manage Mary's social life. She's welcome to reach out to them."

Just keep saying no. Over and over again. Don't bring up Mary's lack of social skills because then it'll just seem like you are attacking her. Keep your responses focused on yourself, not on Mary's incompetence as an adult. [/quote]

NO!NO!NO1

That still makes it YOUR responsibility and like you're shirking it.  be honest with your MIL and DH:

"Why haven't you found her a nice boy?" 
 "because Mary doesn't respond when we try.  We've tried a few times, but Mary ignores our invites."

"why you don't ask your friends to include her more?" 
 "We have included her, but her actions and behavior have let my friends believe she doesn't like being around them.  We have sincerely tried, but Mary gives us the impression she isn't interested since everything we offer doesn't please her."

Keep putting it back on Mary.  Answer everything with, "we tried, but Mary... and tell the truth.

[/quote]

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