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[quote=Anonymous]First, OP never said they asked, and second, DH hasn't apparently asked yet either. Is he afraid to OP?  Can he "see it" coming too?  Then, why don't you talk to him about it -- don't force him to ask you for a favor, tell him it's your problem together and that you need to figure out how to address it together.

As far as the "judging" component, I don't think you'd be judging them so harshly on this if it didn't seem like they had a solid hand in creating the baggage you bring to the table with them.  If they had been more kind to you, or more appreciative, or made your immigration status a non-issue, would your feelings change?

I've started approaching issues with a "what will I wish I'd done in 10 years, or 20" policy.  For me, I'd probably wish I'd spent a few extra bucks and helped them out, won my DH over a bit more, considered it a charitable event and cut my losses. Don't do anything dumb, but if you can help out, even a little, you might be glad you did.[/quote]

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