Reply to my father sneaking into my home..advice please

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would probably tell your dad it is creating an issue with your landlord and [b]you may be asked to leave[/b]. If that doesn't work, change locks.[/quote]

OP, this is right. Since you rent, this scenario could end up with your landlord asking you to leave if he finds out that someone has a key and is coming and going at times when you are not there. Naturally you can lie and say it's all good, but instead I'd do as someone else suggested and get one of those small but very loud door alarms that goes off if the door is opened (you can get them at Home Depot and similar places and they simply stick onto the door and door frame). Re-key the locks if you can but consider how your landlord might react if you go to him or her -- as you would have to -- to say, "Here's a new master key to our place because we redid the locks." You'll have to explain it then, and the landlord will know about the issue and possibly rethink your lease, especially if you're in a unit in a building with other units. I used to live in one place where we could not make copies of the keys or give out keys to people other than those listed on the lease.

You are right to think about things like what could result if you or your husband stumbles out into the living room at night and dad is there, or coming down a dark hallway toward the bathroom, and the result is one of you walloping your father thinking he's an intruder. It's good you found out about his intrusions before that happened. You have every right to set boundaries and that includes the physical boundaries of doors he can't get through. It's so easy for others to say "He's family, you have to look after him," but only you know whether that is realistic in his case. If you can get him to go to a shelter, that would be good, but you do get to say no to his intrusions.[/quote]

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