Reply to Anniversary dinner tonight ...should I tell DH I want to leave?

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Reply to "Anniversary dinner tonight ...should I tell DH I want to leave?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You want to tell him you're leaving during your anniversary dinner, out at a restaurant? OP, that's a really, really shitty thing to do. Even leaving aside the anniversary part, by doing it in public like that, you give him no privacy for his emotional response to the news. All he can do is leave the restaurant. Why would you do that instead of waiting for a private moment? If you really can't tolerate the idea of tonight's dinner, call him and ask him to cancel it so you can talk at home.[/quote]

Can't talk to him at home, our kids will be there with a babysitter.  If we talk in public, at least he will not make a scene.  He's all about public appearances.  [/quote]

You are only doing this to make it easier on yourself - to keep him from being able to react.  The PP is correct: this is extra shitty.  Dumping people is rough, and you are not required to stay to avoid hurting him, but unless you fear for your physical safety, I think the public option is really awful. I completely understand (having left my ex-wife) that it gets to be horrible: there is never a good moment, and every day is full of making plans for the future when you're ready to start making plans for a different future.  Making those plans for things together gets to feel like an intolerable lie.  Get the baby sitter and go someplace private - like a park if nothing else - and give him the news there.[/quote]

The more this thread goes on, the more I'm curious about OP's husband's side of things.[/quote]

Like my Grandma used to say:  "You can pour the batter extra thin, but the pancake will still have two sides."

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