Reply to Would you view this to be a breach of trust?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A woman I have known many years who is a single professional and financially very well off has broached me repeatedly about being a sperm donor so that she can have a child. I would have no financial obligation nor would I be expected to take care of the child. She is not located anywhere near where we live. Quite apart from having a substantial income, she is also the beneficiary of a substantial trust fund so I am confident that there would be no financial obligation.

I am married and my wife would never agree for me to be a sperm donor. She does not know this woman and just to be clear we have never had any sort of romantic or sexual relationship.

If I asked my wife and she refused - as I am sure she would - then I'd be acting contrary to her stated wishes. Would it be a breach of trust if I did so without her knowledge?[/quote]

Rereading your message, it seems you have already decided to do this, and the question is whether you (a) lie about it; or (b) ask your wife and then lie about it. (Withholding information is the same as lying here.) There is a third option, which is present it to your wife as something you suspect she will not like, but that feel strongly about and are going to do. You can offer to answer all of her questions and do whatever it takes to make her feel better about it other than not doing it at all. That would be a principled way to do what you want to do. Would this be a dealbreaker for your wife?

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