Reply to Why is separation/divorce so awful? I am a wreck and don't know where to turn...

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[quote=Anonymous]Even though deep in your heart and head, you know that divorcing this person is ultimately the wisest choice for you and the best thing that you could have ever done for yourself OP, it still is painful.

Remember that because divorce represents the loss of a dream. When you were married, you envisioned yourself with this man for life. You expected to grow old with him, 'til death do you part. Then when things didn't turn out the way you had hoped they would, that dream fell apart which represented a major part of your life. So it would be abnormal for you not to feel any pain.

You are suffering a loss. A loss of a dream, a loss of a very special person in your life. You are going to need time to grieve these losses and thus heal yourself. It will take some time and I am sure the fact that your ex-husband already seems to have moved on to another loved one only makes your suffering much worse.

Keep things in the proper perspective however. I know it is tough, but you must. I am not privy to the circumstances that led to your divorce, but whatever it was that made it impossible for you to have the ability to spend the rest of your life with this man, to live with him as his wife and love him dutifully...Remember, she is the one who now will have to deal with that. You are off the hook and he is now HER problem. Rest assured that whatever wrong he did you, he will do her as well. People will always show their true colors sooner or later.

If the pain becomes too much to bear, perhaps you may be suffering situational depression and should see a Dr.

He may prescribe some anti-depressants as well as therapy to help you get through this very understandably difficult time.

You need to take care of you right now and if you need help, do not be afraid or ashamed to ask for it.

Good luck.

The best is yet to come for you OP. :) You'll see![/quote]

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