Reply to SAHMs: how do you balance time alone versus spouse's time alone

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "SAHMs: how do you balance time alone versus spouse's time alone"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP I agree it is exhausting to take a toddler to gym class!  And I am in pretty good shape.  But there's something about the running, lifting, redirecting, rinse, lather, repeat, over, and over, and over, that takes it out of me.  So you're not alone.  And if you have the option to do errands without your toddler, of course it is easier, smoother, and more pleasant.  A few hours at Target by myself is better than a spa day.

I agree with PPs that both you and DH seem to get plenty of alone time, but that you guys seem to get very little family and couple time.  But what concerned me most about your post, frankly, is the extent to which both you and your DH seem to be "keeping score."  The thing about marriage is that it's never going to be equal.  It only works well if you are both flexible and if you both keep the other person's needs in mind as well as your own.  If your DH feels he needs more alone time, find out what he means by that.  When does he want it?  Is he proposing that you take on solo childcare for even more time than you already do?  Or is he just not that into spending so much time alone with a toddler?  What if instead of splitting up the weekends, he "sleeps in" until 10 a.m. and then from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m., you guys hang out all together, including during naptime?  THat sounds like so much more fun.  It doesn' thave to be the same every weekend day.  Mix it up, try different things, see how it goes.

I also think if your DH is really sleeping in until 3 p.m. on weekends, even with his work schedule, that is not healthy.  He is either depressed, hungover, physically ill, or hiding out.  None of those things are good.  Talk to him from a place of genuine concern and find out what's going on.  [/quote]

OP here.  Thank you for your kind post.  I agree, taking a toddler to gym class (especially a young toddler who loves to run) is tiring.  It's especially tiring if you are tall and are hunched over most of the time, running after your toddler.  My back is a mess after these classes.  Also, my 14 month old weighs over 30 pounds.  He is a big boy.  So its all the lifting, bending and carrying that tires me out.

Anyhow, no my husband isn't sleeping in until 3 pm.  He sleeps in until 10 am and then has his own alone time after that.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics