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[quote=Anonymous]Once, I ran out and got tested after someone I had slept with told me AFTER the deed that he had herpes but hadn't had an outbreak in years. I understand the risk for transmission was low, esp with a condom, but I still felt it was wrong of him to provide that information after sex.

anyway, my advice to you:

1) wear a condom 
2) ask "have you been tested recently for sexually transmitted diseases?" and "have you ever been tested for HSV?"
3) don't sleep with someone on the 3/4th date if you want them to get a test, share results, etc.  that should come with discussions of exclusivity, and more of a relationship. If you are not comfortable using a condom without a test, don't sleep with someone after 3 dates.  
4) how often are you getting tested? Do you get tested after every new sexual partner? what are your expectations about how often to test? FWIW,  When I was dating and sleeping with different people,  I would get tested annually, but in general not get tested in between partners, given that I was using condoms and never experienced any symptoms. The above situation was the only time I felt that I had to absolutely get tested asap and not be intimate with anyone for a couple months.

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