Reply to Sad about how the holiday visit to my family went

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Sad about how the holiday visit to my family went"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]OP, I posted previously - my father has Alzheimers and I found your original post almost unbelievable. In your followup posts you have offered more detail but what comes through is an incredible lack of sympathy for your mother. Before you criticize her, you have to understand what she is dealing with on a daily basis. Alzheimers is a horrific disease - it robs patients of their lucidity and their dignity and eventually their basic skills of self care.

I speak with my father multiple times a day; I am an adult who appreciates the disease (my grandmother had it also, and lived with us when I was a kid) but it still breaks my heart every time. Your mother is living this. She is seeing the most important person in her life reverted to an infantile state, and she is responsible for his daily care. Can you not understand why she might want a little help with taking out the trash?

I'm guessing from your post you are relatively young. And since your father is only 64, I should mention, my mother died at 63 of cancer. No one should suffer and die at this age. It's awful, and you are probably grieving yourself over what is to come. But please, find a more healthy way to process your grief than heaping blame on your mother. Invest yourself in trying to find high-quality care for your father, either as a respite or in a nursing facility. And recognize that what your mother has done is heroic; try to support her instead of criticizing her for being negative during your visit.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics