Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Elementary School-Aged Kids
Reply to "Need ideas for "logical consequences" for hitting"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP - I think you need to get to the bottom of it- why is he hitting? I'm not trying to be "nicey nice" here-- at seven, hitting a parent is out of bounds. I expect that your son knows that hitting is wrong and that there will be consequences, but he's still doing it. I had a seven year boy who hit me occasionally in anger-- the only thing that worked was figuring out the root cause of the problem and addressing it at the source. Parents who have never dealt with this sort of thing may be surprised to learn that punishment was our least effective tool to address hitting at this age- to work, it relies on a child having good self control and foresight. If a kid has these skills they wouldn't be hitting in the first place--for the sole reason that they wouldn't want to upset their parents. [/quote] OP, I want to be clear that I'm not suggesting "no consequences." Just keep in mind that the consequences are more symbolic than a deterring if a kid is having extreme difficulties controlling their behavior. It's the emotional control that needs close attention. Spanking, as some posters are recommending, may encourage power struggles if the root issue is emotional control. The last thing you want is an escalating situation where you spank your child on the behind, have them get more out of control and then they respond by hitting you back. We've tried a lot of different things, and learned by trial and error that a child hitting is about "response control." It's key to help your child learn adaptive responses to anger and frustration because these skills are lifelong. There are some wonderful books that parents can use to help a child with coping skills, re-framing their thoughts, self-talk, etc. These are the kinds of things a child can use their whole life and may build permanent skills in these areas. Again, I'm not saying that there shouldn't be a reasonable consequence, but the consequence is there to show your disapproval and may not prevent future behavior. [/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics