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[quote=Anonymous]Here's what I do:
"Excuse ME! You know that hitting is NOT acceptable in this house! Now, if you have something to express, use your words. If you're angry, use your words. I'm telling you, if you hit someone at school, you'd get in a TON of trouble. The same thing here at home.  This is the LAST time I'm going to explain this to you.  Next time you hit, you get a time out because obviously you need to calm down, and a very serious consequence."

Then when he's calm, talk about what to do when he's SO MAD he feels like hitting someone.  Strategies include:

1. Words, even exasperated words. "Argh! I'm so spitting mad right now!" Not always the best choice, but much better than hitting.

2. Calm down first. Cooling off in a time-out or chill-out space until you can thing of the best words.

3. Useful words: "I disagree with what you're saying, but I'm going to calm down before I respond so I don't say something I regret."  <-- this is hard for me to model sometimes, btw.

Consequences are great if you've brainstormed them together:

1. Loss of a privilege or activity.
2. Need to write a letter of apology.

Whatever.

So that's what I'd say.

My little ones sometimes get very mad at me and (very rarely) hit, too.  They have NEVER hit a friend or anyone else, as far as I know. The hitting is very infrequent and doesn't hurt (more a frustratin thing). They get reminded, time outs immediately and a privilege removed.

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