Reply to Would you date someone who lost A LOT of weight?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Would you date someone who lost A LOT of weight?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]First congratulations on the weight loss and doing it by adjusting your eating habits.  Long term maintenance is hard and only works when you make changes in your life style and life habits, which it sounds like you have.  The old maxim is that only 5% of those who have lost a significant amount of weight keep it off for 5 years.  But those who have the most success are the ones who make the life style and eating changes and maintain them.

And just know that there are many who will overlook the "old you" and see who you really are.  My wife comes from an obese family.  She was heave in middle school and by early college she was obese much like her family.  When I met her, she had lost around 100 pounds and looked fantastic.  About a year later I realized that she was the ex-wife of a former co-worker of mine and that we had met before when she was large.  I had no idea that it was the same person I had met several years earlier.  We were quite proud when she celebrated her "5 years" and only gained back 5-10 lbs.  Now 12 years married and 15 years later, she did gain a little more back (largely due to surgeries and medications) but has still kept over 80 lbs off from her pre-loss weight.  It doesn't matter, I love her dearly and I support her goal of keeping her weight down (I really don't care about her size, but I support her because it's important to her).  As I do the majority of the cooking, over the last 10+ years, I've had to adapt my cooking to help her achieve her maintenance goals.

However, the one caveat that I urge you to think about, is that like one of the PPs, you need to work on your self-esteem.  Learn to accept who you were and what you've become.  Your past is not something to be ashamed of.  You should rightfully take pride in what you've achieved and how far you've come, but not because your old self was embarrassing or demeaning, because you made a positive change in your life.  Everyone has some part of themselves that they can improve and you did that.  Also, my wife has used recognition of her former weight as a focus for helping her keep to the eating changes that we've made over the years.

Good luck.  I am rooting for you and hope you can find someone who will accept and love you for who you are.  There are a lot of guys out there who will support you.  You just have to find them.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics