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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I wish my wife made more money than me. [/quote]

+1 same here brother. [/quote]

Amen.  Until my last job change where I stepped into a technical supervisory role, my wife made more money than me.  I got a significant step up in salary to equal hers.  With twins and a double daycare that is almost as much as our mortgage, how I wish she had gotten a similar "raise".  We could use the money.

OP--people who just start dating are always on their best behavior trying so hard to please/appeal to the new partner.  As time goes on, they relax the best behavior and start to show their true self.  Unfortunately, with the facade fading, you are seeing his true colors.  And, the problem is that the problems are not going to go away, in fact they will continue in that strain.  He is a control-freak and potential abuser.  My sister was in a relationship like that.  They were matched by an on-line dating service, had a whirlwind romance and after about a year, they were married.  An early warning sign was that despite the fact that they had no particular timetable or conflicts, he insisted that they get married (at a justice of the peace no less) on the weekend that I was graduating college and he wouldn't budge.  She moved into his house that had wrought iron gates on every door with double barrelled locks.  You needed a key that was in the kitchen to get out of the house.  He had surveillance cameras on all doors into/out of the house that he could watch from a security screen in his office (he worked from home).  After a few years, my niece was born.  My sister was not allowed to work (he insisted on a traditional SAH wife/mother) and my sister was only allowed out at certain times of the day for specific amounts of time.  After about 8 years, he got more and more controlling.  Finally, he started drinking more and more and verbally abusing her, telling her the usual, she's worthless, she would be nothing without him (he figured because he was rich, he was better than her).  When she contemplated leaving he told her that she could leave at any time by walking out the door, leaving everything behind including my niece.  My sister had no intention of leaving her there, and when she finally tried to leave with my niece, he took my niece away, shoved my sister out the door and tried to slam the door.  The problem was she wasn't out the door and was caught in the door.  She was black and blue from shoulder to knee.  She fought her way back into the house to protect my niece.  She managed to contact my sister-in-law (brother's ex-wife) who lived in the same town.  My SIL came the next day when he was working and got sister and niece out of the house, when he wasn't paying attention.  She took them to a hotel across town and called a friend who the AH didn't know and had that friend come and check my sister and niece into the hotel under that name.

And his behavior started out similar to your BF's.  Don't become another statistic.  Don't get that close.  He's a predator.  Don't become his prey.  Appreciate that you love him, but that he doesn't love you, he wants to own you like a possession, not partner you.  [/quote]

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