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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is a tougher question that PPs are letting on, but the thing is that you won't know whether it's best for you until after you have kids...

I am in the same position - great Fed job with lots of flexibility and a wonderful boss, but the work is boring and not challenging.  When it was time for me to start a family, I decided to stay put because I knew my job would be great for being a mom.  It has been, in every way.  But I am still bored and looking for new challenges.  Now that I pay through the nose for childcare, it is really important to me that the hours I am away from my kids add up to something.  So I am looking to expand my career.  But friends in the same position feel as your mother does - that they don't care about their careers now that they have kids and are grateful for the flexible job.

Short answer - stay where you are and see how you feel after you have a baby.[/quote]

+1 to all of this.  I have 2 kids, ages 6 and 3.  Having the first (who was born when I was 30) was like having a bomb go off in the middle of my life....but in a good way!  What I mean is that, I LOVE being a mom, it has added more to my life than I ever dreamed it would, but it also turned EVERYTHING upside down.  I have friends who were hard-driving career women who now SAH.  I have friends who thought they'd SAH but found they really needed to work to be fulfilled.  As the PP said, you just can't predict how it will go until you're in it.

I returned to school after having my first and had my second while in grad school (DO NOT recommend this, btw), and have made career advances since having my kids, but all along, I've had some job flexibility (and worked PT for the most part) and it has been key to having our family function.  Being able to work from home would be amazing.

I think the lean in/lean out questions become clearer as you and your kid(s) get a little bit older.  For the very intense readjustment periods of pregnancy and infancy I'd also say, stay where you are. [/quote]

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