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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I do more for my in-laws than my husband does for his. I hate how blame is always placed on the wife. My husband has never called his MIL, does not buy her birthday/Christmas/Mother's Day presents, does not send her emails about the kids, does not go out and do things with just her when she visits. He doesn't do any of that for my dad either. I'm fine with this. But why does society think it is my job and duty as a DIL to do those things for MIL. Is my husband, as a man, incapable of doing these things? Maybe MIL's should stop blaming their DIL's and think about how they could have better raised their son to communicate and be thoughtful.[/quote]

+10000

We'll said!

[/quote]

Ain't this the truth. It reminds of 4 months after I was married. We didn't date too long before getting engaged, and started dating right after my MIL's birthday, so I only had one year of her birthday to go through until we were married. We husband's wallet was stolen the night before my MIL's birthday and we were focused the next day on trying to call around and get things replaced, and damn if we didn't forget. She bitched me out something fierce, but only after hanging up on me. I was stunned. I'm like, "why the hell is this MY fault?" It was horrible.

My husband makes zero effort to form a relationship with his in-laws, but I figure you can't force it. You really can't. I do try to make an effort with my IL's and just visited with them. I've always struggled through my visits with them but this time I saw them through my daughter's eyes - she's 5. She ADORES them, and they adore her. I just sort of shifted in my focus and thought, "damn, this is all there is. She loves them, they love here. Done." I shut myself up and just tried to enjoy them. And I did. [/quote]

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