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[quote=Anonymous]Unless you plan to adopt them, I think what you are teaching your sister and her ex is that they can be selfish and you will enable that.  That is not good for the children in the long-term.  Right now things are a mess and staying with you is prolonging the uncertainty of what will happen later.  They might be thinking: "Who will take care of me?  Will I see both my parents on a regular basis?  Who is in charge?  Where will I live?  Will I get to stay at my school? Keep my friends? Do my parents still love me?"  And they won't get those answers living with you.  In fact, since they know it's a temporary thing, it may be causing more stress that both parents are gone and nothing is settled.

Say you have them for another month, another 6 months, a year.  What will that accomplish?  They are still going back, aren't they?

It's hard to watch the train wreck, but I really don't think you can fix this.  It'd be great if a month of love and attention could make up for an unstable home life and shield them from the hurt that will ensue. I don't think that's possible.  The only thing I do think could be achieved by you taking them for a while is to strenghen your ties and your children's ties with them and really, it sounds like it's doing the opposite.  It's really nice of you to take them in but I think it'd be better to send them back.[/quote]

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