Reply to Getting seperated...what is fair?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You sound like a great mom and a very civil person. Yes, he's trying to keep as much as possible for himself, even though there are children involved and this divorce is his choice.

[b]As for having a civil divorce, don't feel like that's entirely your burden, and like you need to give him everything he wants for the sake of your kids. He is exploiting your desire to keep things civil, it seems, and it will hurt you and your kids so much to end up so disadvantaged. [/b]

By offering you next to nothing in this extremely lopsided, outrageously selfish deal, he's already shown you his cards, his nature, and his motivations. He will screw you and the kids if he can to keep the money, the house, and his preferred lifestyle.

And while I really don't want to rub salt in your wounds, I wouldn't assume there isn't another woman in the picture. You need a lawyer to dig into these "debts" he's secretly accumulated and is now using as leverage against you to try to keep the house. Sounds like a lot of flimflam to me.[/quote]

If you take other posters' advice (and I hope you do - it's very good advice), he's going to use your need for civility. He's going to make things extremely uncivil. Brace yourself. You care about your children's well being, and, presumably, your own well being. His actions make it clear he doesn't. So there's no real impediment to incivility other than the law. That's why you need to get legal help right away.

By the way, the likelihood that there is someone else more he's seriously involved with is fairly high. Sorry, but, based on what you wrote about him, that's the probable reality. [/quote]

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