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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Not sure what she said.  She watched me pull out the phone and as soon as I put the phone down, she started whispering in her husband's ear as she was staring at the phone on the table and he then turned to look at it, so I can be 100% sure that is what she was talking about.

Just a bummer and frankly are we all teaching our kids to be nasty and judgmental too?[/quote]

Wait, so you didn't even hear her say anything?  Sorry, but you're the problem OP.  For all you know, she was whispering "Oh, man, I hope the kids don't see that and ask us to get out the Iphone." Because some people are trying to cut down on their kids' screen time.  Big deal.
Or you were playing it too loud and they thought that was rude, and they talked about it in a whispered conversation between husband and wife.  Who cares?  Sounds like you're looking to be offended.
[/quote]

a) it was not too loud, b) I am 100% sure that she was making a nasty comment.  I could see her face and I could see her body language even if I could not hear the words.[/quote]

Even if it wasn't too loud, you don't know anything.  All you know is she was making an unhappy face and looking at your table, and whispering to your husband.  She could have been whisper-yelling at him for not getting her an iphone.  You don't know.  Do you live your life like this all the time?  Making negative assumptions about how people are judging you?  It's SO much easier if you ignore it unless it's blatant.  I'm sure I'm being judged without knowing/paying attention to it and it's so nice to not go around looking for it.  [/quote]

No, actually I don't make assumptions and I don't assume I am being judged unless I KNOW that I have been.  There is such a thing as non-verbal language and that is as telling as the words people  use.  That is why email is a disaster because people cannot judge tone and body language when people are saying things.  Not really worth arguing about it.  It was very clear to me that she was talking about me and making a negative comment.

For the record, she was not making an unhappy face.  She was making a smug face, but it is easier to remain blissfully unaware if you choose not to recognize social clues.

Lastly, you have made a lot of judgments about me based on a small amount of information, so what does that say about you?[/quote]

Nope, didn't make any judgments about you. I judged your behavior in this instance. I don't care whether you show your kids a movie, and most certainly would not have given you the stinkeye. I would have thought "Whatever you gotta do when you're on your own with the kids out to eat." But I also don't go around analyzing the looks people give me. Ever heard of "bitchy resting face"? It's real. I'm also a person who has a lot of internal thoughts, sometimes about stuff other than what's going on in front of me, and it probably shows on my face. So I'm certain sometimes people have thought I was directing something at them when I wasn't. Bottom line, though, if this person didn't even say anything you can hear, then you're only hurting yourself by choosing to take it as judgment. I'd have thought "She's probably saying something about me and the iphone, but I don't know for sure, so not gonna worry about it." And thus, I would have moved through the evening without being offended or angry. Much more pleasant. [/quote]

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